While moving in life almost all of us reach a point where we feel very saturated with our suffering and we keep dragging our life. We wait for something good to happen, and if it happens we feel good for some time. Once the phase of a good time is over and we experience something bad again, we return to the old trap of suffering. Our inward journey starts when we start feeling something is wrong with our life.
These inputs will help you to assess your situation.
We have different life phases that determine the intensity of our inward journey.
1. State of Victim mode: The first and obvious phase is when we try to fix others to feel peace within. We find chaos everywhere, be it in the system, with people, situation-based. We try very hard to control. When we are unable to control we get frustrated and disconnect ourselves. This pattern is common for almost everyone. The process of putting in effort constantly makes us tired and drains our energy. Ignorance doesn't allow us to look within. We suppress, we deny, we ignore, we justify our emotions. In this state, we blame others for our suffering. People who are in this state not very keen to go in because blaming others is very easy instead of taking responsibility for oneself. Even God cannot help them. We get warnings to understand the law of the Universe but our mind brings logic to keep us trapped forever. We come to the senses if the warning is very harsh. Open up to someone like a healer, therapist, or counselor and talk.
2. In this state we start focusing inward but we blame ourselves and criticize ourselves for all misery. This state is critical too because blaming the self is also a trap and we are stuck. In this state, we need someone to show us a ray of light to go forward. Healers, therapists, and life coaches can help you to start with.
3. In this state we start taking responsibility for our inward journey. A lot of courage is needed to take charge of our lives. The moment we take charge shift to an inward journey happens effortlessly. Fear grips us while moving on this journey. Regular deep meditation, breathwork, and guidance from the right person will help you to break the pattern of fear and to move. In this state, we can deal with our emotions and life is a little easy for us. We start enjoying the colors of life. Few people are comfortable in this state and don't want to move forward till they are again hit a low. Intellectual understanding has a limit and they try to incorporate it in day-to-day life as per their understanding. It helps at a superficial level only.
4. In this phase we start getting insights about our superficial belief patterns and to understand our deep rigid patterns. We need sharp instruments like meditation and breathwork to break all these patterns.
In this state, we experience intense pain and fear because we start losing grip on all attachments. As we start losing false identity, we start questioning "who am I'? In this state, people want to dig deep to go beyond. We need a trained teacher or master to guide us because losing attachment may be scary for a few.
5. In this state, we understand attachment to this external world brings only suffering. Moving inward and clearing accumulated toxins is a priority. We experience fewer distractions to move further. If we cannot be disciplined in our sadhana we need to understand the underlying reason. The process of inner cleansing requires a pause to gear up for the next phase. Our readiness is important to go deep in our sadhana. Don't get disappointed if you are slowing down. Enjoy this phase and stay with the intent to go deep.
6. As we grow in our inward journey thirst for knowing the truth goes deep and detachment is a byproduct. This detachment helps one to do the Sadhana effortlessly. Revelation of truth starts happening. Without getting attached one dives deep because he/she knows all answers are within. In this state, one cannot deviate from the path of Dharm. Real dharm is doing righteous things. Here dharm is not religion.
The inward journey is an ongoing process of learning and growing till one discovers the truth. It cannot be limited to only one birth. I hope all these inputs will help you to assess your situation. It is vast I just tried to summarise it. I know it is not enough.
Please feel free to connect for more clarification of your doubts.
Happy learning.